All posts filed under: Life

Taking inspiration and courage from the small silver linings of life…

What are they? Those elusive silver linings at a time when international politics has gone upside down and many re scared, me included? What are those silver linings when the intercontinental love affair that has now lasted over 7.5 years also be the primary contributing factor to the situation that I may have forfeited my residency right in the country that I have called home since the 90’s !? When all that nomadism has rendered me quite penniless, quite literally, at this moment in time? When health is shaky because stress is constant? Silver linings: First and for most of course the answer just has to be: Espresso is a primary silver lining! And: I have had the great luxuries that money can or can’t buy: time. I have had a lot of time in the arms of the one who truly loves and supports me. I have had time, a lot of it, to become the person I am, which would have been impossible in an easier, more standardised and more secure life. I have a …

notes: What price to pay for love ?

A list of rhetorical, pondering questions: What price is love worth? Would you give up your home, life as you know it, your career, your vocation (irrespective if it is working for you or not), would you give up your successes and failures, your friends, your books, your everything that sort of makes sense to you right now? Would you hand over your right to reside in a country that you have called home for 20 years? Would you hand it all over for love? Could you handle it? Would the weight threaten to crush your love? Could your love survive all of this loss? How would you handle the grief, the disorientation of this loss of everything? Would you experience as a loss? Add to all this financial instability, you have no powers, all your security nets are gone. How would you handle this? Would you still trade it all for love? How would love change? Would it change?

From trying out life in America: Finally found a dentist .. What a relief!

report: Reasonably positive experience. Good welcome by reception, the dentist is definitely friendly and gentle (! yay!) and I’d be very happy to share coffee some time. bonus points: she likes popcorn, too.   I’m on the fence about: 1) the office set-up – there was no spitting sink with running water: only a suction device in my mouth.. 2) the follow up: I should have received an email with my x-rays.. I haven’t yet.   Would I go back?: YES if I had an urgent issue, but if I could I would prefer my UK dentist, simply because of cost and 18-20 years of trust.   Recommended?: I don’t know how other dentists in the area are, so if you need one then I would say YES. If you can have other options in Europe with your usual dentist or you need a lot of work done then I’d say: wait and go in Europe. The total cost for entire procedure required (I only took the emergency portion and will complete in the UK): …

It never rains in Northern California…

…. at all. It’s day after day sunshine here. It is definitely very tantalising and the flavour of opportunities around the corner is everywhere. In our case without a car we can’t really reach them because it is true, America is a car culture and you better have a car here or be limited but the opportunities are there. There is a distinctly different attitude here to everything. An optimism that I am always trying to understand the origin of. For example in real terms being poor here sucks more than In the UK even (!) thanks to this culture of ‘the individual’ this mentality that creates and progresses SO much “everyone out for themselves: ready, steady, go” but it leaves one a bit by the wayside when in the UK (up until ‘Cameron the Coldhearted Opportunist’ came into power) and Europe there would be some support to helps bridges gaps until one can gain a foothold again. This here really is not a model I would follow if I had a say over government …

Petsitting in Bernal Heights

After being told that this cat didn’t like being petted and that she is rather moody I was ready for snappy attitudes and a lot of aloof ignoring. Yet within days she was purring on my lap, sleeping in my arm and resting her paws on my right arm as I typed emails and social media posts.. We made best friends! And this just has to be one of the coolest cats that I have every had the pleasure to be friends with! I teasingly called her ‘Zippy’ because I (wrongly) assumed that she would be slow and laid back.. Instead she had so much beans and it was a lot of fun seeing her chase invisible mice from time to time and bounce up and down the bed. I truly fell in love with ‘Zippy’. If we had a San Francisco home of our own, an owned one, I would have pleaded with her family to allow her to come and live with me. What a super, super cat! Daisy the dog was much …

Where can we go from here?

Our housesitting appointment is drawing to a close at the end of the coming week. We by chance got asked to take on another house-pet-sitting gig from the 1st – 4th of August and I said yes minutes before I found out that we likely have lost the (stationary) RV that we were schedule to move into that weekend. So that was a lucky decision. It leaves a rather big question, especially considering that this is the Bay Area with incredibly high rental costs: where do we go from there? We have a grace period of another 9 days or so before I really have no idea where we will go. I had this wild idea of buying a school bus as an art-workshop venue, I prefer to teach lessons and classes in small settings rather than bigger ones, even if I take a pay-cut as a result. I had come up with a school bus when I couldn’t think of anywhere where I could teach, especially with me being new to the area I just don’t …

Driving a Monstertruck around Bernal Heights – San Francisco

Tales from house sitting #2 As part of our house sitting commitments we also need to move the family car for the weekly Friday 9am-11am street sweeping (or risk getting served a pricey ticket! San Fran may be known for the flowers in people’s hairs, but the traffic-parking ticket distributing people have hair on their teeth and no flower anywhere in sight!) From now on we refer to the family vehicle as “Monstertruck” because it is the size of a small house {{{and from a European perspective this is just completely wild; especially considering the family riding in this vehicle are a child and a very slim lady, occasionally another adult. It would be different if it was a family of 6.. But then I would imagine a VW family bus would work the trick and be so much cuter..}}} Now, for the past 20 years I have spent most of my time cycling, driving or otherwise taking note of traffic on the opposite side of the road to America. Street markings are completely different, we don’t …

suggestions on how to find more meaning in life and on journeys

– keep a diary and look away from any screens – learn a local skill or language – are you bragging or are you sharing? I mean: are you just consuming the landscape, the culture or are you participating and can you feel the difference? – What can you learn that you have not read in any guidebook and that therefor you can not tick off of a list that offers 10 stages to travel satisfaction. Is travel a supermarket to you or an opportunity to create something meaningful for yourself, those whom you meet and those at home whom you will share your experiences with..?

“ohhhhh !!!!!!! this is terrifying and exciting in equal doses! “

Terrifying it is – incredibly. I am departing with not a lot of money. Not a lot at all.. It looks like I have money for immigration purposes but once you take into account my bills there is a lot less than zero in my life… Jason will help while I will arrive empty handed really.. I am to some extent purposely putting myself into this position I live in the illusion that I can force myself out of my shell, to jump over the shadows of shyness and to finally crawl out of the chrysalis that I have barricaded myself behind.. Is it wing speeding time or will I flap like a fish on land… even they eventually figured it out… I just hope I am like the fish who figured it out, not like the last one before the fish who figured it out and who instead perished.. Witness me jumping into a very deep dark unknown. You will no doubt find out what happened next. (credit card power sufficient to get me home …

Last full week before departure

I can’t exactly believe that I am really off, with so little money in my pocket and so little self belief.. But it might be what I need to prompt my confidence to finally sprout and grow. Somehow I feel like I have been so slow at growing in general, it took so long to realise so many basics of life.. Today I will start on the admin that necessarily needs to be prepared for any long journey. I also will take a trip to the charity shop and see if they would like to take all of my things off me. I also am running behind with my studies at my Thai theory Course and need to take that more serious and not miss this opportunity to learn.