I’m struggling, lonely and feeling the weight of the world on my shoulders. I need a pro-actve project to pull myself out of my shell, and will begin with a silly daily Blog journal. I say silly because it is personal, not professional, but it is to practice my writing-for-myself muscles. I stopped experiencing joy when sharing anything online, I instead weigh if what I write reflects me in an unprofessional light.

I think the one thing that is worse than being seen as too sensitive and judged as potentially unprofessional is: to become invisible. I have allowed myself to become invisible, that’s not a good thing. It means I don’t really live anymore.

And this Blog Journal is for me, to be perhaps a public embarassment but at least not be invisible. I can only be myself. If I am not myself I shrink into a corner feeling ashamed of not being professional enough to merit my public presence. It’s embarrassing but I don’t know how else to tackle to problem. It’s a catch 22.

Soon I will set the visibility of some of my blog journal posts to subscribers only.

Subscribing is free but reassures me that someone is out there in the universe… And setting some posts to surbscribers only will let me limit who sees me in this whimsical, vulnerable way. And I don’t expect you to read my daily diaristic rambling. There won’t be a quizz at the end to check if you read every post. There will be no ‘exam pressure’. If you subscribe you might get notifications when I post – I don’t enable notifications on every post either.

Do you have a journal writing project of your own? Or how do you combatt loneliness and life struggles? How do you restart a stalled life or career? Have you ever done it? Please share your wisdom in the comments or send it to me using the private contact tab. I’d love to know.